I'm right now sitting in my room here in Kauai reflecting on this past year of 2015. How did I get here...to where I am now? In half of the world right now its already 2016. I always start to feel an urgency to clear many things at the end of the year before moving into a new year. I need to speak what has not been spoken. I need to express what hasn't been expressed. I need to share the beauty and pictures that I was not sharing. I need to let go of everything that I have been holding on to. I need to listen within and be in stillness. I need to move beyond all fears into expansion. No playing small--only growing bigger and more fully into who I am.
This year was a leap of faith. Really navigating the unknown. Really surrendering and trusting, and being led and guided. A year of adventure and travel. A rich year of spiritual deepening, awakening and activations. A year of service and starting to do the sacred work I am on this Earth to do.
I started out the year in Canada. Then I was traveling for 54 days (2 months) throughout the continent of Africa through 10 countries: South Africa, Namibia, Botswana, Zambia, Malawi, Zimbabwe, Tanzania, Kenya, Uganda and Rwanda. Camping outside every night under the stars. My heart was hungry for Africa and my soul was thirsty for God. I experienced the energy of mama Africa, her power, her majestic beauty and all of our animal friends that roam the savannas. The most powerful moments for me in Africa were being in the light temple in Cape Town, Namib desert for sunrise, learning from the Bushmen how to survive with plants and herbs, drinking in pure Shakti transmission at Victoria Falls--the most powerful place I have ever been on this Earth--seeing how happy the people of Malawi are naturally, swimming with dolphins off the coast of Zanzibar, camping in the Serengeti and doing safaris, hiking in the mountains of Uganda and doing Gorilla tracking and making some really beautiful connections with some of the souls I connected with on this journey.
Then I spent 3 months in Europe. Living in Berlin, and also traveling to Glastonbury (England), Paris and London. The time in Glastonbury was an activation of the Sacred Feminine, the holding of the High Priestess and the remembrance of Avalon. Paris was luminous and magical. London I felt the winds of destiny.
I spent the summer back at home in Canada for 2 months out in nature facilitating a beautiful Nature, Goddess, and Sisterhood retreat on my grandmothers land. Did an underwater photoshoot. Spent everyday outside in the sun by the cornfield under a tree resting in being and listening. Feeling inspiration flowing through.
I then went back to Europe for another 2 months this autumn where I was living in Berlin again doing the Sacred Women Circle's and facilitating the Sacred Feminine retreat with over 100 women in 6 weeks from 25 different countries. I am so grateful for all the sisters I met in Berlin, soul friendships and anchoring the Divine Feminine back into Berlin through our embodiment, remembrance, sisterhood and reverence for the sacred feminine.
I spent the month of November in Canada, and now in December I have been in Hawaii (Maui + Kauai).
Sometimes with being in so many different places in the world, you grow into the world more fully. I feel that. This year I was in 15+ countries in North America, Europe and Africa.
I am really grateful for all of the support I have...and feel from my Facebook community here...friends and family...some people I have never met in person but feel connected to and ALL of you. Thank you for being in this journey with me.
I feel blessed, loved, supported.
The last few days I have also been feeling sadness, pain and confusion.
Really allowing everything to come up, and to fully feel everything.
I feel like I have dropped onto my knees in surrender and much humility.
I am anchored only in that which has been moving me this year.
Knowing and remembering that in every moment, even when I feel alone--I am never alone.
As much as its been a beautiful year, even a beautiful year is filled with darkness, challenges and growth. I've experienced heaven and hell. Ecstasy and despair. Life and death. Dying and rising. Then more dying...simmering and burning...following by rebirthing.
What I learned this year is that its takes extraordinary faith, courage and TRUST to live a life where you are a servant and vessel to that which is living you, directing you and seeking expression through you. Many times this year I was on my knees wondering if I was capable of handling everything I was experiencing. So much intensity.
Even when your world is falling apart, and you feel washed by life--stay true to that trust that lives within your heart. Never forget how much support you have on both the visible and invisible realms. Even in the times where you feel like you are dying--grace is always here.
I love you all. I really love you.
Thank you for loving me.