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Sacred Feminine Embodiment + Heart-fueled Trailblazer + Soul-centered Creatress

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Nicole Hemmer, MA

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The Mature Human Heart: Embracing Pain, Suffering, and Darkness

November 14, 2018 Nicole Hemmer
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๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐— ๐—ฎ๐˜๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—›๐˜‚๐—บ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—›๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐˜: ๐—˜๐—บ๐—ฏ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฃ๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—ป, ๐—ฆ๐˜‚๐—ณ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐——๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ธ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜€

I was having dinner last night with a small group of friends at a fancy 5 star restaurant overlooking the Ayung river.

They asked me about my time in Canada this past summer, after reading my raw intimate sharingโ€™s during this time in which I posted about the extremely painful and tumultuous experience visiting a mental health hospital; that sparked this fire within for the reclamation of our true humanity to be reinstated on this Earth.

As I sat in this beautifully decorated restaurant with candles and torches lit, with the most scenic view of the jungle and flowing river below, I was washed from within with a tremendous gratitude.

A deep humbleness was felt. A humbleness for the opportunity to be where I was in that moment.

I realized how grateful I was to be in such a beautiful classy restaurant in Bali with friends, and then all the memories of this past summer came flooding back to meโ€ฆ

Memories of seeing atrocious behaviour by hospital management, acts of abuse, dehumanizing methods used in hospitals within the mental health ward, the condescending way doctors speak to patients and patients families, the absolute lack of integrity and responsibility within health care professionals and the overall cold heartless environment that my family member was held in came flooding back into my consciousness.

I was reminded of the lack of humanity I witnessed and experienced excruciatingly strong during this summer in Canada, and how it broke my heart open even wider then before and forcefully opened my eyes to the current state of consciousness on this Earth, and the brutality that is existing within many spectrums of our society.

In this moment, in this gorgeous setting of beauty, I was reminded of the darkness and pain on this Earth right now.

I connected back to all the suffering I witnessed during this time in Canada, and all the people I could feel in this moment that are experiencing disconnection, isolation, loneliness, numbness, deep pain, sadness and depression in this moment of time around the world. Both people I know, and people I donโ€™t know.

I felt it all in my heart simultaneously, while in this beautiful atmosphere having dinner in paradise in Bali.

Sometimes in these moments of beauty, and bliss, itโ€™s easy to forget the simultaneous realities that are coexisting around the planet.

Itโ€™s easy to tune out the worldโ€™s suffering and pain, and isolate ourselves in a bubble of bliss and perfection.

What I have come to realize is that all realities exist, and we can tune into different realities at any moment.

My personal practice that has emerged from my own direct experience this summer, is to keep my heart and full being open to everything that is happening and existing in the world.

To not run towards beauty and push away the darkness and ugliness, but to embrace all spectrums of life, and keep my self open to the full spectrum of living and existence in every moment, wherever I am.

Whether in a 5 star restaurant in Bali, or visiting a mental health ward of a hospital.

๐˜ž๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ ๐˜ข๐˜ฎ ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ ๐˜ฅ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฌ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด, ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜บ ๐˜ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ฉ๐˜ต, ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ถ๐˜ต๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ด๐˜ด.

โ€จ๐˜ž๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ ๐˜ข๐˜ฎ ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ฉ๐˜ต, ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜บ ๐˜ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต ๐˜ฅ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฌ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด, ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ช๐˜ฏ ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ด๐˜ถ๐˜ง๐˜ง๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ.

To embrace it all, full spectrum, is to live in genuine spiritual maturity on this Earth.

Itโ€™s to be wholesomeโ€”rooted in the truth of the diversity of life.

To not deny or push away anything, but to gently embrace and hold it all within our tender and powerful human hearts.

This is the power of the human heartโ€”the capacity to hold all of Life simultaneously and all its perceived contrasts and polarities in the core centre of truth, openness and congruency.

I choose to live with eyes wide open.

I choose to see everything.

I choose to feel everything.

๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

I refuse to close my heart to what is unbearable and will allow life to be the crucible that cracks the radiance of the sunlight within my heart to be showered out in the world.

I will not push any emotions awayโ€”whether those that feel good, or donโ€™t feel good. I will feel them all, and let them flow through me like a river.

I will allow the Wholeness of life to baptize me in the colours and fire of life.

And I will keep my entire heart and being open to the blessing of life in every moment.

โ€จโ€จI will remember to see the beauty and radiance in the darkness, and to see the ugliness and shadows in the light.

...Less then 1 more month until my book is published....๐ŸŒน

With a strong open heart, eyes wide open:

Nicole

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