The last few weeks have been turbulent, riding the waves of the intensity and severity of life. Sometimes life comes in and shocks you. It throws you to your feet, and presents you with something that is unbearable and devastating—in order to annihilate you, and birth you into a newly embodied version of yourself.
I’ve taken a 3 week absence from Facebook, in order to fully be present with a traumatic event that life has presented to me and my family. My family member who is currently in the hospital in the mental health unit, was attacked and assaulted by 3 security guards one night.
The hospital did not call my family and let us know of the incident, and instead I was the one to find my family member covered in blood, unable to speak, bruised and a smashed in eye the next morning when I visited the hospital. The hospital didn’t even clean my family member up, and instead injected this person with 3 needles to be knocked out. Brutality.
On this morning I had to call 911, while being in a Canadian hospital—isn’t that absurd? The police came. It was like being in a nightmare, a horrific event that has shaken the depths of my being—and destroyed me.
When someone who is already extremely vulnerable; emotionally and psychologically fragile, who is in the hospital for mental health is attacked and beaten by security guards that are employed by the hospital—does it get any worse then this? To create even more trauma on top of trauma. This is the world we are living in. This is the state of humanity at this time on Earth.
Institutional Abuse. Human Right Violation. A sickening expression of a dysfunctional unhealthy society. Abuse of Power.
These last weeks I’ve felt Enraged. Sick. Shocked. Sad. Tender. Vulnerable. Disappointed of the world we are currently living in, and spiralling in an ocean of emotions that have been washing through me.
Sometimes I truly feel that we are living in the dark ages right now on this Earth. The future that I feel, and am rooted in, is one of an enlightened civilization. Where we are right now, is the completion of a very dark period in humanities evolution.
I really don’t even have much to say, considering that every piece of me has been annihilated through this event. The last weeks I have been dealing with hospital management, police and lawyers. What another world I have been catapulted into.
This has been a nightmarish experience—and has been the most painful, severe, disturbing, shocking and horrifying life event to date. It’s almost like something I would read about in the news, or watch on TV.
And guess what? This is happening to thousands of people around the world everyday. Many of these horrific events of institutional abuse and violence remain clocked in silence by those suppressed, vulnerable and without a real voice in society.
Often in the mental health arena, it’s easier to label someone as crazy, stripping them of their human dignity then to actually treat them with the respect, dignity and compassion they deserve.
This incident has showed me the failure of our systems to truly care and help those that its meant to serve, and the importance of justice to be honoured. It is a human right violation for those in positions of power to abuse their power and inflict violence on those under their authority.
Sometimes, we don’t fully feel the depths of insanity on this Earth until it touches us in a very intimate way. And this experience for me has been the most intimate of the intimate—because even though it didn’t directly happy to my body, heart and soul—I have felt the impact of this severely within myself, as our family is an extension of ourselves. As are we all.
I ended up going on a personal retreat to New York for a couple days, to the St. Francis Peace Centre where the sisters of St. Francis and Nuns reside. I walked the labyrinth on their retreat property, walked in the forest, and spent time on the Niagara River on the border to Canada. While in the library one day, sitting there in silence, my attention was directed to a book in the shelf with the title “All is Grace”. It spoke to me.
~ Can we find the grace in life events that appear to be horrific and the darkest of the dark?
~ Can we find the blessing within the perfection of life?
~ Can we accept the Divine Will, even when it looks very different then our personal will?
~ How deeply can we trust the higher intelligence of life?
~ How can we be a champion of truth, and bring awareness and light to the violence on this Earth?
~ How may we serve as peaceful Warriors of the light actively in society, as opposed to living a dichotomy of our spirituality being separate from what we invoke, inseminate and infuse in the world?
What I do know, is that this experience initiates me into a greater depth of awakened soul leadership, unparalleled compassion for those experiencing suffering in the world under the hands of those in power and authority, greater love, deeper trust and even more gentleness and sensitivity to every living soul I encounter.
It awakens the warrior within me, to speak up for those who don’t have voices and are being held within the walls of these institutions! To speak up for those who experience brutality, violence, abuse and denigration! To speak up for those who don’t have the freedom to speak!
I feel this experience has been a strong catalyst for grounding all this light and my divinity into the most darkest and messy nature of our human existence. Bringing the light into human life in a very grounded and practical way, with people in society that I would normally not be in relation with. The warrior of truth within me in service to love standing up for what matters, and reminding them of the qualities of human dignity, nobility, and compassion.
My prayer today is that we may live in a world that shines with the truth of Who We Are. A world where we no longer live in ignorance of our true nature, and operate in alignment with the cornerstone of love of our very being. A world where we no longer need to talk about spirituality, because we are all living the essence of truth. A world where we have reclaimed what it truly means to be human, which is living with the wisdom and intelligence of our heart on the mantle of our divinity. We cannot harm another human when we are healthy. We cannot continue to contribute to the madness on this Earth when we have peace within ourselves. May the Divinity of Justice and Compassion be resurrected for All, and may the sins of ignorance be forgiven in the Heart of the One for all of Eternity. And so it. Amen. ❤️🙏